Sweet Silence
by bensoneames
Summary: Olivia struggles with the thought of never having a family of her own. CI crossover. Takes place during CI's third season.


The park bench was cold. Olivia squirmed a little, trying to pull her jacket down further over her rear. It wasn't working very well. Giving up, she leaned back, ignoring the freezing cold wood.

She looked around. Central Park, it was here where so many horrible things had happened. People were murdered in this park, and yet, people still returned, bringing the very children that were preyed on, here to play.

Olivia watched the children; they jumped and played laughing and shouting without a care in the world. Yet the children she worked with daily, did have cares, and some of them were cares that not even an adult could deal with.

Olivia closed her eyes. If she concentrated hard enough, it would all go away, the traffic, the noisy adults on cell phones, the shouting in the streets, all of it; gone. The only sounds left were the voices of the children. Then it was quiet. The world seemed to melt away, a great big mass of noise; gone.

Elliot was walking towards the bench, two hotdogs in one hand, and a cell phone in the other. "Stabler. Okay, great." He closed his cell phone, slipped it in his jacket pocket and sat down beside Olivia. Her head was in her hands, and her elbows on her knees. When he offered her the hotdog she jumped a little bit. "Sorry, I thought you saw me sit down," he apologized taking a bite out of his hot dog. Olivia took the other and took a bite also.

"That was Cragen, he said that everything was under control back at the station, and that we could take a long lunch," He said, turning sideways, trying to read the expression on her face. It was blank, completely blank. What he didn't tell her is that Cragen informed him that Olivia was not to come back to the station until she had relaxed a little bit, and that he should probably try to go spend time with Kathy.

"Hey Elliot," Olivia said quietly, staring off into the distance. "Yeah?" he replied, finishing off the rest of his hot dog. "Before you were married, did you want kids?" she asked, turning around and looking at him for the first time since he had sat down. The passion for life that normally lit up her dark brown eyes was gone, in place of it was hurt and longing. Elliot started to say no, because he really didn't, he was happy being a bachelor, following his own rules, doing his laundry when he felt like it, but he saw her eyes, and knew where this question was headed.

"Yeah, it's perfectly normal, you'll meet someone Liv, and you guys will have lots of kids and live happily ever after," Elliot said, trying his best to make things seem perfectly normal. Olivia just sighed.

"I tell you what Liv, you should go talk to Eames, from the Major Case Squad," He said, pulling out one of their victim help cards from his pocket and starting to write an address on it, "she could probably make you feel a little better than I could." He leaned down next to her, handing her the card. She took the card from him, reading the address. "She won't care?" Olivia asked hesitantly, turning the card back and forth, running her fingers over the raised writing on the front. "I'm sure she'd love the company," Elliot replied, rubbing her back. He got up, "I'll come pick you up on my way home from lunch with Kathy, do you want me to walk you there?" Elliot asked her. Olivia smiled faintly, and shook her head. "Okay then, well I'll see you in an hour or so," and Olivia just nodded.

Taking a deep breath of the cold air, she stood up. The air froze her from the inside out, sending chills up her spine and across her arms. Shivering slightly, she looked at the address one more time before slipping the card into her coat. Putting her hands deep in her pockets, she walked towards the road. The noise was coming back, and Olivia wasn't quite ready to face it all again, but she pressed forward, pushing it all to the back of her mind.

She had no idea why Elliot would send her to see Eames, maybe it was because Eames too was the only female detective in her group, and Elliot was trying to get her to make friends, but Olivia was sure that it was more than that. She just had to wait to see what was going on.

Olivia found Eame's apartment building without any trouble. After working these streets for six years, there were some perks, and being able to find her way around in any situation was one of them. She opened the door to the lobby and stepped inside. The warmth from the room thawed her out almost immediately, maybe even a little too fast, for her skin felt fiery yet her fingers were still freezing. She rubbed her hands together, then took hold of the railing, and walked up a flight of steps. She looked at the business card again, and knocked on the second door to her left. Olivia leaned towards the door, out of habit, and listened. The television was turned off, and the pattering of footsteps caused Olivia to lean back to a less nosy position in front of the door.

Alexandra Eames answered the door barefoot, in boxer pants, a stretch camisole, and an excessively fuzzy button up sweater, which wasn't buttoned. Eames self consciously pulled the cami down over her burgeoning stomach. Olivia just stared. Eames blushed, pushing her hair behind her ear, still holding the door with the other. Olivia snapped out of it, "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry," she said rubbing her index finger along her temple, cringing. Alex just smiled. She was used to people staring at her stomach, then scowling when they saw no wedding ring. "Its fine," she said sweetly, "come on in."

"This is why Elliot wanted me to talk to her!" Olivia realized, remembering him having mentioned that she was on maternity leave. She smiled; Elliot always did have the greatest connections.

Alex closed the door and walked past Olivia, buttoning up the bottom part of her sweater. "Can I get you something to drink, or to eat?" she asked, picking up a half-pint of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream from the counter. "Sorry about the mess, I've been really lazy lately; you wanna sit on the couch?" Alex asked, as she took a bite of the ice cream, knowing Olivia wanted to talk about something that was bothering her. Elliot had called her about 15 minutes ago, to give her a heads up, but Alex hadn't expected her so soon. She went to go sit down, moving one of the massive pillows out of the way, easing down onto the couch. Olivia was watching her, or really, her stomach. Alex smiled, she knew what this conversation was going to be about.

Olivia sat down on the edge of the couch, and Alex could tell she felt uncomfortable. "So when are you due?" Olivia asked softly, trying not to stare at Alex's stomach. Alex took another bite of her ice cream, and covered her mouth as she answered, "In about a month or so, I was put on desk duty about 6 months into it all, and after about a month of that I guess they got tired of walking around my massive self." Alex said smiling. She was really radiant; the extra rest she was getting from being off work, and not around Goren 10 hours out of the day was doing her appearance world of good.

Olivia played with the bottom button of her shirt. Alex spoke up, "Did you want to talk about something?" she asked, putting the ice cream on the side table. She pulled her leg underneath her, and turned towards Olivia. "I don't know, I've just been thinking a lot lately. I just regret not being married; I want to have a child so bad." Olivia confessed, leaning back into the couch. Alex reached out to put her hand on Olivia, but stopped, taking an excited breath, startling Olivia. She sat up straight and turned to Alex to see what was wrong. Alex shook her head, and took Olivia's hand, putting it on top of her stomach. Olivia scooted closer, and looked back at Alex, confused. The baby kicked against her hand. Olivia turned her head, looking her hand, then back at Alex, who just smiled. Olivia felt like she was five years old, mesmerized by such a wonderful phenomenon. "Does it make noise?" She asked inquisitively. Alex nodded, pulling up her cami to the top of her stomach. Olivia pulled her feet up on the couch, tucking them underneath herself, and put her ear up to Alex's belly, which was warm and soft. It was hard to say what it sounded like, but one thing was for sure, it wasn't traffic, or people yelling, it was silence, sweet silence.


End file.
